We read a plethora of materials on marriage. We attend a ton of seminars and workshops…
All of these are good, and needed but lets take a look at an excerpt from what I believe to be the most reliable source of instruction…The Bible
Recently I read 1 Peter 3:1-7. It provides admonition to wives in verses 1-6 and then includes husbands in verse 7.
There has been controversy over the verse (7) that refers to women being the “weaker partner” (NIV), and some have used verse 3 as counsel against jewelry. I assure you that neither is the focus of this passage. I believe that these verses reveal a very important truth: Wives have a major impact on their husbands, and the marriage in general. So much so, that it can be the determining factor in the husbands salvation!
Well, you ask, what is the deal with the ‘outward adornment’ and ‘weaker vessel’ stuff?
As husbands, we of course want our wives to look their best. There is certain ‘power’ that a wife possesses when she is deemed physically attractive, or sexy. Money is spent to have hair and nails done, and to purchase makeup and beautiful clothing because we (husbands, and wives as well) like, yea even crave the end result. It that wrong? Of course not! What the passage is saying however, is that these things should not be the tool that wives solely rely on to influence their husbands. The real power that a woman possesses is within. The NIV puts it this way: “…It should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” A wife’s impact…
As for the ‘weaker vessel’ issue, Peter is not saying that women are inferior to men by any means. Someone who is weak cannot have the massive impact that this passage implies. It is an awesome task for a wife to submit to her husband. There is a level of vulnerability, and sacrifice that accompanies that submission. This vulnerability exposes the softer nature of a woman to the harsh density of a man, thus putting them in a position to be taken advantage of. Peter recognizes this and counsels husbands to be considerate and respectful to their wives. Husbands are reminded that their wives are directly connected to the success of the union, and to what Peter refers to as ‘the gracious gift of life’, so much so that our prayers will be hindered if this is ignored!
A wife’s impact…
The application of this passage of scripture can be the turning point in our marriages!
A Wife’s Impact…is great!!
Study the scriptures and study your spouse, because both are hard to interpret (tweet this)
– Pastor Kerwin Lee
(NIV) Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
Oliver & Denise Marcelle are the founders of Denoli, LLC (speaking, facilitating, and mentoring/coaching).
They have been married for 22 years, have 3 children and 1 grandchild.
Through seminars, a podcast, videos, and social media posts, they offer a candid look into their own marriage, with the goal being to encourage couples and help them explore, grow and learn together.
Oliver and Denise can help you build the relationship of your dreams, both personally and professionally.
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Ira Ballesteros Francisco
what is submission?
does it mean i have to accept whenever he talks disrespectfully to me? i dont know what to do.
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No, it does not mean that you should be disrespected and do nothing.
Colossians 3:18 talks about wives submitting and adds a very key stipulation – “…as is fitting in the Lord.”
There is a difference between submission and subjection to abuse
It is a husbands duty to love and honor his wife
You mentioned not knowing what to do…we would like to help you , if we can. If you would like to talk further about it with us, please feel free to email us at firstname.lastname@example.org