As a matter of fact, he does it quite frequently!
Ok, ok, ok…I should probably explain lol. If you know my Oli, you know he’s the most attentive, selfless person in the world – especially when it comes to me or our children. So no, he doesn’t INTENTIONALLY ignore me or my concerns. BUT, there’s something I have to admit…
Sometimes when I’m upset, worried or stressed, there’s a tendency for me to become irritable with Oli. Don’t worry, I already know that this is unfair to my poor husband and the Holy Spirit is already working on me about it, so no need to shake your head at my ONE fault! (jk!) I know it’s wrong & most of the time he WILL call me out on it.
So yesterday, I asked Oli to buy milk and bread while he was at the store. Later in the evening, I realized that he forgot the milk and bread. Ugh! In my mind, I’m thinking, “Dang it! It is now 11:30 at night; the store closes at midnight and we’ll NEED this stuff tomorrow!” Outwardly, I sighed, rolled my eyes, grabbed my wallet and the car keys, mumbled, “I’m going to the store!” – and left in a tantrum-enriched HUFF! Yes. I. Did! And what did Oli do…?
He IGNORED all of my drama and just said, “ok”.
See, my Oli is a smart man, way smarter than me. He doesn’t flip out or fly off the handle. He always seems to think ahead, and looks at both sides of the coin, as it were. He knows that retaliating with his own heated response would have just escalated what is a really small thing into something big, ugly and unnecessary. He knows that I am not perfect and that I too have forgotten a thing or two (or three) on my shopping trips. He knows that if I weren’t so stressed at the time, I probably would have reacted differently – or actually not at all – over such a non-issue.
More importantly, he knows that
a truly wise person uses few words (Prov. 17:21).
He chose to be that truly wise person.
So once again, the Holy Spirit, via my hubby’s “ignorance”, grabbed me by my shoulders, shook me & told me to get a grip…that it’s just bread & milk and we wouldn’t have died without them.
I think the reason that Oli “ignored” me was my Holy Spirit reminder that I need to think before I react. These are the instances where I’m glad he ignores me…and prayerfully, he won’t be ignoring me for too much longer, because I will have learned my lesson!
So my question to you is…is there an area of your life that needs “ignoring”?
Be blessed & stay married!
Oliver & Denise Marcelle are the founders of Denoli, LLC (speaking, facilitating, and mentoring/coaching). They have been married for 19 years and have 3 children.
Through seminars, a podcast, videos and social media posts, they offer a candid look into their own marriage, with the goal being to encourage couples and help them explore, grow and learn together.
It is their belief that all relationships stand a chance, if given the right tools.
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