If you type “top ten reasons for divorce” in any search engine it will render several results. I can guarantee you that somewhere in most of the lists will be finances, or financially related issues. For example, one spouse is spending frivolously while the other wants to save. One spouse is making the majority of the money and as a result will not entertain any suggestions from the other on spending. A couple is struggling to make ends meet and the stress that accompanies this just eats away at the fabric of the relationship…I could go on and on.
I am very grateful that Niesy’s love for me and her committment to me is not shaken by our financial issues, because we would be in trouble!! We know of marriages that have disolved over money issues, so we know firsthand that it can definitely cause problems. Although at times we get frustrated over money matters, thankfully Niesy and I have been able to (with God’s help) struggle and strive simultaneously.
We do, however want to minimize the struggling portion of that equation. We have some goals we want and need to accomplish and they require that our finances not only be in order, but also be thriving. I feel like the answer to any financial issues we may have would be to obtain, as my wife would say, “a ten pound bag of hundred dollar bills” LOL! But seriously, we have decided to get some suggestions on how to ‘clean up’ our financial situation and forge a new path to ‘financial peace’ (talk about a segway…lol)
We are about to go through Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University. We have heard good and bad things about this program, but we are going to check it out and see what we can glean from it. By the way, if any of you have ever gone through it, we would love to hear your feedback (admin@marriageisourministry.
This post is not intended to suggest that every couple needs to attend the FPU classes. The point is that financial issues do not have to cause problems in your marriage! Aim to diagnose areas that can be worked on and tackle them headon…together! In the words of Pastor/Dr. Maurice Bryson: PAUSE, PRAY, PROCEED (tweet this)
Step back, take a look at your situation, without fussing and arguing about it. Look at, and agree on areas that can be tightened up.
Self-explanitory…Ask God for guidance and direction. Ask for wisdom to make sound financial decisions
Take action on the things that you agreed upon. Seek outside help if needed.
Do not make the mistake of equating finanacial peace with being rich…one does not necessarily mean the other. It is possible however to budget, save, live within your means and enjoy life at whatever level you may find yourself. As in other areas of your marriage, do not compare your financial position to that of other couples. Work on creating/traveling YOUR path, and work on doing it TOGETHER, at YOUR pace!
Don’t allow financially based issues to bring conflict into your marriage. Make a committment to work together to achieve Financial Peace!
Oliver & Denise Marcelle are the founders of Denoli, LLC (speaking, facilitating, and mentoring/coaching). They have been married for 20 years and have 3 children.
Through seminars, a podcast, videos and social media posts, they offer a candid look into their own marriage, with the goal being to encourage couples and help them explore, grow and learn together.
It is their belief that all relationships stand a chance, if given the right tools.
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